The Urban dictionary defines a family as – “A group of people, usually of the same blood (but do not have to be), who genuinely love, trust, care about, and look out for each other. Not to be mistaken with relatives sharing the same household.”
That defines the Ruffino/Diamond family of Orchard Park.
If the name sounds familiar, it should.
Their story became a national sensation. They were on Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, and in the pages of People Magazine. An Orchard Park mom – vowing to her dying best friend – that she would care for her four daughters. Now, three years later, I checked in on the beautiful family who inspired so many around the nation. I talked with Laura about how life has changed and how the girls are doing.
Liz Diamond and Laura Ruffino were friends since the fifth grade. And when Liz, a single mom, was diagnosed with stage four brain cancer – their friendship didn’t waver; in fact, it grew stronger. Laura helped care for her sick friend. She took her to doctor’s appointments, for tests, and treatments.
Those favors, it turns out, were tiny in comparison to what was to come.
Laura told me it was a simple sentence from one loving mother to another, “Everybody thinks it was this long, drawn out thing, but it was very simple. Just one sentence really. Liz said, “I need to talk to you about the kids. If anything happens to me, I need to take my kids.” I said okay, and that was it. She never cried, never showed weakness.”
It was, says Laura, a very matter-of-fact thing. They got their lawyers to draw up the papers and that was pretty much that, “In the will she put that she wanted Rico and I to take the girls.”
So they obliged. Rico and Laura Ruffino took those four heartbroken little girls ages – 6, 8, 9, and 12 – home to live with them and their two girls who were 12 and 14.
It was an instant blended family.
And it wasn’t easy.
But, as the saying goes, nothing worthwhile is easy. Laura admits to doubting herself, but never the situation, “I remember saying to myself, “I don’t know if I can do this. But, then – I can’t imagine not doing this.”
Laura’s husband, Rico was all in, too.
Their family doubled in size in April of 2015. Two daughters turned to six daughters. And it was something special.
Laura says everyone is doing very well, “The new normal, I never thought we’d get here, but we did. It was a long haul, but we did it. We made it to this place and we are so grateful and thankful and really blessed.”
Times were tough along the way. All those firsts.
First birthdays without their mom. First Easter, first Halloween, and a gut-wrenching first Christmas, “Oh, it was so challenging. My heart broke – just looking at their faces and trying so hard to make it special.”
But, now – it seems the memories are good ones. And Laura says this past Christmas was absolutely wonderful,”It was beautiful. The girls loved it. They were so happy. Their mother was with us, we have her pictures and stories, but really, this was about the girls. It was beautiful. It was busy, don’t get me wrong, six girls and 12 days of Christmas, so it came with chaos, but it really was something special.”
    
    
Laura says they are victors, not victims. And the kids are flourishing.
The Ruffino girls are happy and healthy – Isabella is 16, a high school junior who loves acting and modeling and has a role in the movie, Coldbrook which was shot in East Aurora. Grace is 14, a freshman who loves to cheer.
The Diamond girls are great, too. Tara is 14, also a freshman, a star athlete who loves to run and play basketball. Simona is 11, in the 6th grade. She’s in track and gymnastics. Ella is 10, in 4th grade and loves gymnastics. And Lily – is 8, a 2nd grader who is into exercising with dad, Rico.
Six girls in five different schools, but they make it work. Laura says she celebrates their individuality and encourages the girls to follow their dreams.
Laura says she’s incredibly grateful for so much help over the past three years, “I cried all the time. We felt so much love. Not only for my family, but my new girls.” The logistics of cooking for eight…, laundry for eight… taking the girls to school, dance, gymnastics, and on and on and on was never easy, but Laura says the community has really helped when they needed it most.
West Herr gave the family a van – a much needed van – and churches and other organizations and individuals helped with household appliances, food, and other necessities.
Laura often thinks about her friend, Liz – how could she not, “It is amazing. Sometimes I think – well, I want my friend back. I mean, there’s a daily reminder of a friend lost – I have these girls looking at me with these big brown eyes – and I see her. I say to them sometimes, you look just like your mom today. It’s a constant reminder, but I feel so thankful. I feel so blessed.”
Liz Diamond passed away in April of 2015.
It was a difficult transition, a tough time – but, they figured it out. They did it together,
“I have to commend Bella and Grace. I thought it was going to be a Brady bunch show – and it wasn’t. It wasn’t. But, they did such a great job. It went from my girls who wanted mom and dad to kids who needed mom and dad.”
Laura says having such an amazing life-partner has been an incredible blessing, “My husband, Rico never complains. He just does it. He is, I mean honestly, he is a really, really, really good dad and a good man.”
They are all one big – very big – happy family. They’re always on the go, doing fun and interesting things. They love family time together.
They’ve raised some money on a go-fund me page, but they’ve used most of it on daily living expenses, school, and other important things. They still have to think about graduations, college for six girls, weddings, and everything else that comes along with parenthood.
And there is one thing Laura and Rico would love for their girls,
“We would love to take them on a trip to Walt Disney World. They all deserve that so much. I don’t know that it’s possible. I mean, so many have been so generous to us, but we have to think about groceries and school and clothing and all of that now, and then college and all of that down the line. I’m not sure Disney is possible, but the girls would just love it.”
This group is proof that family isn’t always blood –Â it’s always love. It’s difficult to imagine such an enormous gift. What Laura did for her friend is an incredibly special, selfless thing. Raising children is not easy – raising six girls – well, that has to be incredibly challenging. But, during my conversation with Laura, she didn’t complain once. We spoke for a good 45 minutes to an hour – and she never said anything negative. Nothing. She exudes the joy and love that she absorbs from her family. That is amazing.
They are a family, “A group of people, usually of the same blood (but do not have to be), who genuinely love, trust, care about, and look out for each other. Not to be mistaken with relatives sharing the same household.”
You can help the Ruffino-Diamond family with expenses, and perhaps that dream trip to Disney – by donating to their Gofund me page, https://www.gofundme.com/ruffinoadoption  (If you can’t donate right now, just sharing their story will allow others the opportunity to give)
Share their story, spread the inspiration.
I’m going to suggest someone who knows this awesome family; write a letter or share this with Ellen. Mark it Deserving Family- Great Deeds